Judah left his brothers and went to stay with another man.
He met a Canaanite woman named Shua and married her. In Genesis, this is
usually a bad move. God wants his people in a specific area, marrying a
specific people. Whenever this family branches out and marries foreign women,
they get crummy kids, strife, and other problems. Judah and Shua had three
sons, Er, Onan, and Shelah, and they aren’t what we would call a rousing
success for humanity. Judah arranged a marriage between his oldest son and a
woman named Tamar.
But God decided Er was too wicked to live and killed him.
We don’t know what he did, but it must have been bad. Maybe he was greedy. God
has been known to smite the greedy. Then Judah told Onan, “Sleep with Tamar to
fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law, and raise up children for your
brother.” Onan knew the child would not legally be his. So whenever he slept
with Tamar, he’d spill his semen on the ground so she wouldn’t get pregnant.
God didn’t like this and put Onan to death too.
This is supposedly the masturbation portion of the Bible.
(Yeah, I’m going there.) Many people (still, shockingly) go, “See! See! Onan
masturbated and God didn’t like that and killed him.” Okay…sigh. It’s fine with
me if you believe masturbation is wrong. I believe porn and objectifying people
aren’t great (Matt. 5:27), and lots of people need to engage in
those activities in order to masturbate. But to use this passage as evidence
against all masturbation isn’t a strong move, logically.
First of all, the old testament is obsessed with
procreation and heirs. They need to build the tribe, they need to continue to
the family line so that Jesus can be born, the oldest son is very important, it’s
taboo to marry a foreign woman (or a woman who isn’t related to you in some
way), and heirs are a man’s very future. None of that is the case today.
Secondly, I’m inclined to think that God was more concerned with the
selfishness and lack of honor shown by Onan that the act he performed in order
to avoid his duties.
Third, would we ever make a legal surrogate son for a
dead sibling by sleeping with their widow? No. Does God necessarily want us to
do that? No. It was about Onan’s heart. There aren’t a whole lot of life rules
here besides “don’t be a sneaky jerk.” Tamar needed kids to support her in her
old, widowed age in the future. It was a legal duty among these people that
survived years later and was codified in Deuteronomy. It did not survive after
rabbinical law was dropped. Fourth, there is doubt as to whether this was even
masturbation. It sounds more like pulling out to me. Fifth, Onan used Tamar for
sex. Hey, maybe THAT’S the capital sin here.
It may surprise you, but I don’t think masturbation is
that important, one way or another. We gorge ourselves on Taco Bell (gluttony).
Is that any different than…scratching an itch? Is masturbating worse than
having sex before marriage? A guy once told me that it will happen anyway in
your sleep if you don’t get that release. My mom had a kindergarten classmate who
would do it. All the kids called her “worms” because they thought she was
scratching at worms. BAH HAHAHA. Someone else told me that it’s actually sex
because it’s “sex with yourself.” I disagree with that. Sex is a mechanism that
helps people connect and become one flesh. I’m already one flesh with my flesh.
If God thought masturbation was a big deal, he would have
AT LEAST mentioned it in Leviticus where sex is extensively discussed. Even in
strict rabbinical law, masturbation doesn’t factor. It’s like God is saying, “Yeah,
that’s your business. You can’t police that.” How can it be a big deal or huge sin if Leviticus didn't even care about it? I don't think we need another Biblical rule that's nearly impossible to follow. I'm still working on "love your neighbor as yourself," thanks. Don't add things!!!
I think this is one of those issues where it depends on
the person (like watching rated-R movies; some people can parse them logically,
or know what’s going to disturb them or tempt them. Some people are moldable or
too young). What are you thinking about when you’re doing it? Is it an
addiction for you? Does it drive you away from God? Does it fuel inappropriate
levels of lust? What are you looking at when you’re doing it? Do you feel icky
afterward? What if you’re thinking about your spouse? What if your mind is
clear? Does it mean you are “mastered by the flesh” if you are not master of
your domain? If you spend all your time resisting and thinking about resisting,
doesn’t it master you then?
Does Paul’s “I can do anything, but I won’t be ruled by
anything” assertion apply here? (Because if you’re addicted to it, yeah, that’s
not great). Have you pledged allegiance to a church that forbids it? Is it
hurting anybody? Should we necessarily assume that it negates purity? What’s
unpure about a Christian’s body if the mind is on allowable things? Does it
help your self-control to fight the urge? Does that make you a better person?
These are all things you have to think about. The Bible doesn’t talk about it.
It’s a grey area where you get to decide if it’s helpful or harmless. It’s
between you, God, and the fencepost… Actually, leave the fencepost out of it. Oh jeez, I swear this is a Christian blog you guys.
Are you still with me?
I shouldn't be allowed to talk.
I know some people are going to strongly disagree, and they have a point. Even if it's okay, there's a fine and mostly mental line between "natural" and "okay, now you're giving into lust too much." I don't like when people say, "Well, it could lead to actually having sex or adultery." Of course you can find a link between something everyone does and anything a group does later in life. Hey guys, studies show that 99% of people who read books, ride bikes, enjoy ice cream, and enjoy frolicking on the beach masturbated in their teens?!!!! Well, now you know. Even if you think it's a sin, you have to admit we have much bigger concerns. Still disagree? Then enjoy this useful article http://christwire.org/2010/05/how-to-spot-a-masturbator/
It wasn't until the pics in the link that I realised that the article was actually in satire. While I don't know anyone irl that thinks like that, every now and then I see people on the internet who could write that article and be totally serious, so I had to check out some of their other articles to make sure. I don't mind Christian satire, though I prefer something more like LarkNews myself.
ReplyDeleteMeant to add a bit more. I agree that it would be hard to rule one way or another that masturbation is a sin, rather it would be more helpful for each to observe if it leads them on to other sins which the Bible has explicitly taught against, and if so then it may be appropriate for them to learn self control, or avoid putting themselves in a situation where they know they'll be tempted and testing themselves for no good reason.
DeleteI totally thought that site was real at first too. It's not far off of real Christians a lot of the time, and that's why I like it. It's not that unfair in its humor if it hits close to the mark. I like The Onion and cracked.com for humor most of the time.
DeleteYeah it's good when Christians don't take themselves too seriously at times, and display the inherent humorous parts of themselves or their culture with affection, rather than with at the expense of others. Was restricting myself to just Christian humour above, if not Cracked (and sometimes the Onion) would be towards the top of the list (the list would further expand if I included video and image/comic sites).
DeleteGetting up in the morning can lead to all kinds of nasty things, but we still do it. I don't think that passage has anything to do with masturbation (technically, it's the "pulling out" thing you mentioned). I agree with you when you say that if such an act becomes an addiction (as with any pleasurable thing), then it becomes sin. Like drugs to an addict. Same thing. We Christians tend to get all tongue-tied over the sex subject (as a Catholic, I could write a dissertation on sexual repression), but I believe God sees all of these acts (gluttony, drinking, drugs, sex, etc) in the same way. Anything that becomes more important to you than Him is a problem that will eventually consume you.
ReplyDeleteIt's true. Time Keller always says (and I think he's quoting someone) that idols and things that take you away from God mostly aren't bad things. They are good things that have become ultimate things. If the idea of giving up something for God scares you, it's best to tone it down or get rid of it.
Delete